NOTE - The main purpose of this post is so I can save time by sending a link of it to people requesting reinstatement. It may also be of general interest, but it obviously doesn't apply to 99% of the people here.
I've been banning a lot of members lately, with an admittedly quick trigger. Ideally, I would be more patient, have a private conversation, etc., but honestly, that hasn't been very successful. So now the procedure is I'll delete an annoying/offending post, then if it happens again, I'll make the decision to pull the plug. It's all pretty quick, and unlike before, we do this quietly now, with no public post about it, so there's less drama.
There's a "Reason for banning" field that the user will see when they attempt to log back on, so I'll usually say something along the lines of, "Lets give this a few days, then I might lift the ban." That particular line is the reason for this post, as I usually intend to lift the ban in a few days, but alas, the emails I often get are not very encouraging that there will be much change. Don't get me wrong, I'm not looking for groveling or ass-kissing, but it would be helpful to see some indication that the member "gets it," without me having to further spell it out. We wouldn't want to lift a ban unless things were going to get better, right?
So if all I get is an email saying, "Hey, it's been three days, so let me back on!", then I'm not feeling assured that the underlying problem is solved, so do I (or we as a community) really want to bring the member back? Especially in most cases where there's already been a pattern of this? Bear in mind, these bannings are done because the offending behavior is annoying to the general membership. Petty arguments, or repetitive update requests, or general dickishness are not things people come here for.
The forum is already busier than many of us would like, and becoming increasingly unwieldy, so it's an "Is the forum better overall with or without this member?" decision. I won't go so far as to say "thinning the herd" is a goal, but if a particular impala is the herd jokester who thinks it would be fun to walk over and piss on the lion's face, well ... sometimes the herd thins itself.
Anyway, if there's no contrition in the "Hey, let me back on!" request, then it falls to me to to take the next step and say, "Okay, we can lift the ban, but you understand that you've been annoying lately, right?" Which invariably means I'm going to be pulled into a debate about what's annoying and what isn't. And then I'm doing a bunch of work, all so someone who pisses on lions' faces can get back on the forum.
A more patient admin might go through that process, but people familiar with the forum's history will know that I didn't buy VI-C because I had a lifelong dream of running a forum. Rather, I bought it because it needed help and I was in a unique position to step in. (The "unique position" being that I had Frederick's trust and that I could make a significant financial offer.)
The upside of me taking over is no more fundraisers, no more email ads, etc. The downside (at least this particular downside) is that I'm not blessed with a lot of free time. Mind you, I try to stay on top of important things and I take a lot of pride in the forum. But for less important things (reinstating members, for instance), it's not just that they get pushed to the back burner, they get pushed waaayyyy to the back burner. I'm juggling Realitone, my studio, the forum, my family, and I still get the occasional composing gig. I consider myself very fortunate for all that, but the downside is that my time gets allocated into "Things I need to do now" and "That pile of things I'll eventually get to." Harsh, I know, but that's the reality.
I do feel bad to ignore banned people, I really do, but unless they're quick and easy (is it really so hard to simply write, "Sorry Mike, I was being a dick when I responded to MemberX"?), then along with all the other emails and tasks that are on the back burner, it will be a while before I get to them.
I've been banning a lot of members lately, with an admittedly quick trigger. Ideally, I would be more patient, have a private conversation, etc., but honestly, that hasn't been very successful. So now the procedure is I'll delete an annoying/offending post, then if it happens again, I'll make the decision to pull the plug. It's all pretty quick, and unlike before, we do this quietly now, with no public post about it, so there's less drama.
There's a "Reason for banning" field that the user will see when they attempt to log back on, so I'll usually say something along the lines of, "Lets give this a few days, then I might lift the ban." That particular line is the reason for this post, as I usually intend to lift the ban in a few days, but alas, the emails I often get are not very encouraging that there will be much change. Don't get me wrong, I'm not looking for groveling or ass-kissing, but it would be helpful to see some indication that the member "gets it," without me having to further spell it out. We wouldn't want to lift a ban unless things were going to get better, right?
So if all I get is an email saying, "Hey, it's been three days, so let me back on!", then I'm not feeling assured that the underlying problem is solved, so do I (or we as a community) really want to bring the member back? Especially in most cases where there's already been a pattern of this? Bear in mind, these bannings are done because the offending behavior is annoying to the general membership. Petty arguments, or repetitive update requests, or general dickishness are not things people come here for.
The forum is already busier than many of us would like, and becoming increasingly unwieldy, so it's an "Is the forum better overall with or without this member?" decision. I won't go so far as to say "thinning the herd" is a goal, but if a particular impala is the herd jokester who thinks it would be fun to walk over and piss on the lion's face, well ... sometimes the herd thins itself.
Anyway, if there's no contrition in the "Hey, let me back on!" request, then it falls to me to to take the next step and say, "Okay, we can lift the ban, but you understand that you've been annoying lately, right?" Which invariably means I'm going to be pulled into a debate about what's annoying and what isn't. And then I'm doing a bunch of work, all so someone who pisses on lions' faces can get back on the forum.
A more patient admin might go through that process, but people familiar with the forum's history will know that I didn't buy VI-C because I had a lifelong dream of running a forum. Rather, I bought it because it needed help and I was in a unique position to step in. (The "unique position" being that I had Frederick's trust and that I could make a significant financial offer.)
The upside of me taking over is no more fundraisers, no more email ads, etc. The downside (at least this particular downside) is that I'm not blessed with a lot of free time. Mind you, I try to stay on top of important things and I take a lot of pride in the forum. But for less important things (reinstating members, for instance), it's not just that they get pushed to the back burner, they get pushed waaayyyy to the back burner. I'm juggling Realitone, my studio, the forum, my family, and I still get the occasional composing gig. I consider myself very fortunate for all that, but the downside is that my time gets allocated into "Things I need to do now" and "That pile of things I'll eventually get to." Harsh, I know, but that's the reality.
I do feel bad to ignore banned people, I really do, but unless they're quick and easy (is it really so hard to simply write, "Sorry Mike, I was being a dick when I responded to MemberX"?), then along with all the other emails and tasks that are on the back burner, it will be a while before I get to them.
